I'm Back

That title has so many meanings! I haven't posted for a long time, first because we were so busy, then because we were moving back to AZ, and then because I didn't feel like I had anything nice to say so I didn't say anything at all. I'm still not sure that I have anything nice to say but in order to grow I feel I must try and be positive!

So in February Josh got a call from his brother that he could have his job back in AZ if he wanted it. Only catch is he had to be there by Monday....this call was on Tuesday, so we had a total of 6 days to decide what to do and arrange things if we were going to move back.

Well at three times the pay he was making in FL it may seem sort of obvious what to do, but after really thinking about it we were very undecided. There were millions of things pulling us back to AZ. And millions of things keeping us in FL. In the end it was decided to move back and leave the Sunshine State. I have felt for a while that the sunshine itself stayed in FL. I just have this overwhelming feeling that I was where I belonged and this is sooo not where I should be. BUT...this is where I am for now and so again I will try to be positive. My family is happy and of course I am happy to be back with my family, and it's hard for them to understand why I might not want to be here.

I guess the only way to overcome the disappointment is to look at the last 8 months as a grand adventure and an experiment and that the experiment was a success and now the goals can be set in stone without hesitation of the unknown. We will move from here someday and open up a world of opportunities for us and our boys, hopefully it will be in the South and more specifically FL near the ocean.

There are many smaller goals that need to be accomplished before then and hopefully as we accomplish these I will feel that much hope that the end goal will be reached! For now I will learn to love my little small town again....OK maybe in June when it quits snowing and the wind quits blowing, but if you talk to me or see me and I am a jerk, please forgive me and know that I am fighting my own internal battles.

Please forgive this post that seems more like a personal journal entry but this is one step to getting over my blues. One last note that does make me smile, when I was packing and talking to the boys I asked Cody if he was ready to move back to AZ he said yeah, and I asked why he wanted to...he tells me " Well... Mom ...that's where all my people are!" Well, duhhhhh oh to be a child and have an uncluttered mind.....I think things are so simple for them because they are so pure!